As a little small girl when I am at such a tender age..,
I tends to watch many many dramas especially those lovey dovey scenes..,
I always enjoyed putting myself into their shoes..,
I will always imagine myself to be the main lead as me enjoying those moment with the main guy in the show..,
Many shows have fascinated in my life..,
Until now.. I still believed that one fine day I will find my Knight..,
The moment I grow up..,
I still believe in those lovely fairytales coming true
& never thought about breaking up or anything..,
So as daily pinnings come on those feelings I implanted in dramas..,
I slowly transplant the feelings to reality..,
I actually mixed both reality and virtual together & believe in those "happy endings"
I thought I have found the right one when I was sec 2...,
I actually found my first love & begin on a love journey..,
Amazingly.., like dramas, I believed that we will last for ages & till death do us part...,
But sometimes God just doesn't let the first to be your last..,
My first love & I broke up.., leading me to a deep depression
Results flopped.., parents' disappointments.., mix of wrong friends & all..,
Nothing seemed to be right except the fact that I want my first love back..,
But just wanting to forget my first love..,
I caught myself badly stuck in the love relationship..,
I was stuck there.., being there for a long period of time...,
I thought I have moved on but actually I have not moved on a single bit..,
I guess this is how foolish of me..,
Finally the day I have been anticipating has officially come..,
I have finally moved on by finding a man who I thought truly deserves my heart..,
I give my all to him.., my everything except certain limits just to him..,
Then.., the way how I think during my tender age starts to occur again..,
I thought of him being the 2nd Knight to take my heart away...,
The man who swept my heart away soo much.., until I still remember all..,
He made me believe in something called "future" after my first love & many others..,
Never once believe in forever after my first love's departure..,
But his appearance made me believe & I truly deeply madly in love with him..,
But I guess once again.., some stuffs are just so fast to start & so fast to end..,
My story with the man who made me moved on actually ended..,
Just when I am enjoying the sweetness and happiness he give me..,
He shattered everything by letting everything come to an end..,
Thus I know this depression is so much severe compared to the first cos I believed..,
I believe in too many things of me & that man who made me believe..,
Buckets of tears continued to shed every single night & day..,
My tears just wouldn't stop for I love that man still so much that time..,
He never know.., for he already found his love..,
I never once had any bad impression of him but one fine day..,
Things just couldn't be worse.., I thought I can totally moved on..,
But I was wrong.., the day he told me & his girl "This Is All Just A Game"..,
It send me sinking directly right to Hell..,
As I never know that man who changed my life & made me believe actually stab me right into my heart..,
It pierce directly through my heart until I know it constantly bleeds..,
But God just wouldn't let me wake up in a wayy..,
I was in fact still thinking of me & him the happy memories instead of the sentence..
I guess.., God sure knows what he is doing..,
I know a friend through MapleSEA..,
I know him through online.., not much chatting just random..,
He is such a lovely friend with me for gradually fifth month that time..,
But things are just so unexpected when you didn't expect it coming your way..,
The man who I know for quite sometimes & he is just a mere friend..,
Actually confessed to me & tell me he wants to take great care of me..,
I was completely apalled for what he has said..,
Completely too stunned already.., I didn't expect the man whom have been my friend to have fallen for me..,
I have always been myself being with him for he is a really nice guy..,
I know I wasn't ready that time.., I didn't answer him anything yet ask him questions
Slowly.., I realized he is truly in love with me..,
But God just didn't give me the right feelings..,
I know my heart has no feelings for him at all..,
No feelings towards for whatever he is doing & I know I am really tensed..,
But so surprisingly..., God sure knows how to play pranks on him..,
Just when he is giving up.., I have fallen so deeply into him..,
I have no idea why but he suddenly makes me so in love with him without doing a thing..,
I didn't expect that to come at all.., but it just happen..,
Without him doing anything.., I am in love with him & I did fall for him..,
Slowly.., finally on the 1oth Oct the man opened his mouth..,
The man who cured my excuses of being in love with Spongebob Squarepants has become my Boyfriend.., the man whom actually have been by my side without me knowing..,
The guy whom I never noticed much but just a great friend has become the man I am in love with.., the man I am attached to since then..,
Both of us embarked on a love story & for the first time..,
I know how to differenaite what is reality and virtual...,
I no longer mix them together and happily put in my feelings for this man..,
I know I am in love with him dearly.., so deeply.., so sweetly..,
Well.., I don't wanna think any further but cherishing each day with him..,
Having him by my side is the sweetest temptation God has given me..,
Seriously.., sometimes I am so in love with God for doing miracles
But sometimes I am so hating God for causing negative stuffs..,
But I guess this is parts of everyone's life story...,
Sometimes as I looked back at my own life..,
I realized how foolish I can get by believing in those fairytales..,
Yes sometimes those thoughts are there but I learnt to control being with this man..,
Well.., this man is just so wonderful towards me & everything..,
In our relationship as it still carries on..,
I learnt the word "forgiving" through him.., he taught me this..,
& letting me no longer being so immature & pampered..,
I love to tell people about my man because he deserved to let people know..,
For I have loved him since 1o Oct.., so deep so loving.., I guess so..,
The man is none other than Desmond Toh Yong Qiang ; the man who I always mentioned in this blog of me & him.. (: I guess I just want to show off.., how lucky to have such a great Boyf.., this is love, isn't it?
<33
& I Believe A Fallen Star Has Finally Become A Glittering Star Back In The Sky (: