Desmond!

& I Love You So Dearly, My Boyf (:
Realized that has become my catchphrase already (: Here I am to update me & my Boyf's blog. Dearest, how'd you find the photo? Is it nice? Anyways, I bet you are sleeping all the way now. So ya, I ain't bothering cos I guess you are super exhausted right now. (: So ya, goodnights & sweetest dreams. Hmm, moving on. Today didn't quite have a wonderful date with my Dearest ): Cos today seemed so weird. I have no idea but Dearest feel so distant -.- I don't know why, but it just seemed so hard to not think why is my Boyf enjoys to keep a distance from me. Well I guess Dearest can't always be there for me. Well, things happen unexpectedly. (: But before I go any deeper, I must thank Boyf for helping me to find a job (: Whether succeed or not, thank you. <3 Oh & later as I continue to type, photos will be posted (: For I have edited quite a few photos & only this blog can view it. I am kinda lazy to open it in my own blog. So I decided to blog here. Well, I realized I kept having weird things happening daily. >< So weird. Firstly, its on the fact that Jonathan seemed to be against Boyf. Oh well -__-" ain't giving a damn towards it. Cos I am Happily Attached to my Boyf, next is on 18 Nov, my GodBRO which is some guy which is younger than me a year asked me to be his Girlf. Weird, of course. But ain't caring much. Cos I know I am attached again (: Another thing was Randal was being all crazy. He want to kiss me ._. WTH. Hahaha, he was asking if he could kiss me & know the different. Lol, I simply rejected him by telling him "I am tired, I want go sleep lerh, bye". Lastly, just when I thought things are going to be OVER, Faith contacted me & told me about Jordan. Okays -_- I have no idea what face should I use & how should I feel. Boyf wasn't there when she was telling me all this cos he was already fast asleep. Hmm, she was telling me that Jordan M.I.A &&& she told me she and Jordan have a blog together. Woah, what should I feel? Well I ain't feeling sad or what, just find it abit too coincidence. Cos before that, Choyyu was asking if I am missing that Bastard. I give her an instant no. But God sure love to play pranks on me..

Faith actually called me after so long. && She talked to me about Jordan aka the Bastard which Choyyu mentioned. Well, I know I was feeling kinda lost cos Boyf & I had something like a weird tiff? xD I don't think it is quite considered a Tiff, its just that I can't bear to say goodbye to him. Everytime bidding farewell to him, my heart loved him abit more & makes me wanna run towards him and tell him "I love you" But oh well~ Didn't get to do it cos I know I will definitely be emotional ): So ya, I also don't know why. My boyf loves to think that I am showing attitude. But simply the fact is it is a way for myself to love him so much && not crying. Been quite emotional with Boyf lately. ;x I hate myself for that ): Well, I must say "Life goes on" xD Boyf ain't everything, so ya! :D I must bear that in my head. Don't want to be teary. Back to Faith's calling me. Well I was feeling very lost that time cos Boyf wasn't there to assure my heart & make me feel safe. But I know my heart is missing Boyf loads loads ): Despite the fact he didn't call for I understand he is tired, I know I love Jordan no more, but sometimes the memories of Him lingers when Boyf ain't there. Well, people all knows my head run wild when I am feeling sad & lost x; Something bad about me, I guess. :D Hahaha, well sometimes I guess I am like a typical woman who really hopes her Boyf to be there for her instead of making her feeling lonely. So I guess this is me when I am kinda selfish ;x HAHAHA!

Moving on, for the fact my Boyf ain't there. I can't say anything. Geeehhh sometimes I guess I am too easily sadded by everything around me. HAHAHAHA. Especially coming to my Boyf & my Best Friend. So ya, I guess sometimes the importance can be so strong till I get hit so easily by what they do, or any other things. Well I was hurt quite a few times today, but I guess I will simply just endureee (: Well, I know what my Boyf will ask me what it is. I guess I must say (:

"Your own prob, go and think yourself and solve it"
"Huhh?!?!?! I need to go home and study"
"You can type so fast everything"
"Aiya, she everytime also like that"
I guess what I want to hear at that moment was "No need to accompany me back to Tamp, cos I will be studying. & anything need my help, just call me" The last part, I do hope he will say "Not bad! I got a girlf to type so fast (:" Well, I am starting to memorize lines of my Boyf already. But I must say, Boyf I am really getting used to it already (: So no worries. Urm, moving on. Let me post pictures &&&&& no worries, you will see inspiration coming on :DD cos I will continue posting pics (:


& No Point Pinpointing Your Boyf's Mistakes Yet Loving Him For What He Is
No point sobbing for what he can't give you. Yet sing for joy for he is being who he is. Regardless how hurt it can be, be glad at least he is being who he is. Have no desire to change him cos he is still the same old guy. You can't change a leopard with spots, it all takes time. Don't think it is just awhile yet you have to give a whole lot of time to change the man you love. Get used to everything he is, stop mouring and hoping he will change. It is impossible to change someone when someone has become like that for th past years. The more you bleed, he won't know. & you will be adding more pressure for him so therefore it is always best to let nature take its course or else disasters will happen continuously over the same old thing. No point hoping so much, just let time prevail it all. The more you hope, the worse it gets. So it is best to let things come naturally. Well I can say all this because that's how my Boyf is. & I am going to accept for who he is. I keep thinking he will change but I rather let things be like that or else things will be very bad. (:


& Don't Because Of Stupid Stuffs Turn Your Back Against Your Boyf Or Girlf Yet Simply Just Love Him
If you turn your back on your Boyf, you will know alot of stupid things will happen. It is always best to forgive and forget &&& definitely loving him more. Well I am a weird nutcase cos although my Boyf say hurting things unknowingly, I can't bring myself to get angry. Even if I showed atittude, it is kinda weird for me. My heart will feel all weird ): Well, sometimes forgiving and loving your Boyf more makes you knows that you love him can already cos I realized I don't give a damn if he knows what I think of him because I just simply love him. The more I keep thinking of his heart like that like this, I will cry even more in my heart & get myself all stuck. But I know that I love my Boyf for what he is. His words may hurt but that is him. (: Well times have changed, my thinking have been better compared to last time. Yes unhappy is unhappy. But why not change the unhappiness inside me to let your Boyf be happy? Cos I know that I want to stay happy so that my Boyf stay happy (: Don't care if he understands or not, just be happy (:


& He Is Already The Key To Your Heart, That's All You Need To Know
Well, I told you I am a nutcase. I realized how much farewell hurts me so much until I can't stop but feel all unhappy and want to cry everytime I say goodbye to my Boyf. Well I love him. Its a fact. Love him so much until now I am preventing myself to love him loads loads, because it hurts me everytime I think of something stupid. I hate loving a man so much cos it hurts me. All I can say is let just hope I won't go berserk. Well, sometimes he makes me berserk in a way of how he uses his speech. Can't help it but just wonder when he can't change. I hate myself for having unrealistic thoughts but I guess that's me. I also don't know if he can accept me for who I am. ): But I guess sometimes in life, some stuffs are best not to be known. Even the key I have give him, I really hope he can use it wisely. Cos by using it wisely, there is nothing to worry. Well I guess I can just love him the way it is. I hope it is not so deep or so less. I am just going to be who I am, I shall try (:<


& Close Your Eyes, You Will Realize You Love Him That Much When You Use Your Heart
Do you feel so lost when he is not there for you? Do you feel so pathetic and everything is so shitty when he is not there for you? Do you feel so unimportant when he is not there for you? Do you simply feels all the negative feelings?? Well if you do, you are in love. You are in love with your Boyf, cos this is the way I have the feelings for my Boyf. After moving on from Jordan's hurt, my feelings is refreshed and making me feel new. Well to be honest, Desmond is one different guy from all my ex. He is a mature man, so mature till I know that I have to just understand whatever is running through his head. So this is my life. I realized no matter how different he is, I just love him for the way he is. Even throwing temper at him, I also have to really think twice. Hard is hard, but I guess this is how it works, right? Love takes two hands to clap, without two hands. It won't work at all. I guess this is how love comes about. Boy meets girl. Girl meets Boy & then happily ever after, right? But inside the process got so many things. Let's simply just hope I can faster cool down and talk to him but if I really do cool down, I think I am too nice & he wouldn't know what I am thinking. Oh whatever ._. I feel so useless shit suddenly. Okays. I sux as a girlf. >< Kill me, someone. (:
& Last Long With Happiness And Smiles, Alrighteyy? (:
-ZhuBa0Ba0x3 & -ZhuBaOBaOx3 LAST LONG LONG arhhhh (:


& It Kept On Dripping On My Shirt Soaking It With Fresh Blood
I have no idea what is running through me. I kept telling myself how much I don't bother his words, but it is so impossible to not listen. I listen to every word he say. Every emotion he displays to me, I can't help it but bleed. Can he somehow stop saying things like "Aiya I think we don't talk la, no topic" Geeehhh, I can't help myself but feel sad again ): I don't know why. But I am so easily emotional. I must get used to it, but I want the world to know "I LOVE YOU BOYF" I am getting used to everything. I give you my word, that I will get used. I guess I will stop asking you comments for photos. I really desire to hear no more yet simply just love you only. I love you so much. Ease my pain, will you? The fact I kept thinking why you ain't there, stop me. Tell me how much you love me, miss me, want me, need me. Stop making me feel agony. Your emotions left me thinking alot and Boyf, I love you so dearly. I don't know. Tell me how? Am I obessive? Or what? Tell me. ): Cos I seriously hate the feelings running in me now. Confused & Clueless )):


& I love you Boyf. <3 I am loving you that much All the inspirations is from my heart I have no desire to say further. But Boyf, I love you. Muackieeeees Can you simply just tell me how much you know... <33 对不起！如果自己爱你爱到很深，请你原谅我因为我对你已经无法自拔了